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Showing posts from June, 2017

A Year of Stupid

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A year ago today, we Brits awoke to hear the results of the big referendum. And 48% of us were mighty disappointed to hear that 51% of the population were indeed, as feared, Stupid. The campaigners for Stupid had worked tirelessly for 40 years for this and credit must be given where it is due. To induce 17,000,000 people into a state of oblivious stupidity is quite the task, but they succeeded. The big question – is Stupid a viable economic and social policy that will help take this country forward? We’ll see, I guess. But much has happended since then. Let’s bring you up to date with how this is all working out for us.
Within a few hours, David Cameron, who had promised to see the result through as PM no matter which way the vote went, resigned. He was Stupid enough to fornicate with a pig in his younger days, but decided that this level of Stupid was beyond him. The Tory party decided to replace him with Theresa May’s Strong and Stable Stupid, rather than Boris ‘Insan…

Understanding Trump

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Last week, Donald Trump heroically prevented the squashing of one of the most endangered insects on the planet by the careless actions of the prime minister of Montenegro, who came within an inch of stepping on it. In fluent Croatian, Trump alerted his international colleague, “Budi oprezan, prijatelju. Gotovo stao na Dryococelus australis. Znate li kako je rijetko ovih kukaca su?” before gently diverting the PM away from impending disaster. The liberal media, of course, twisted this manly deed, reporting it as an international faux pax committed by our dear leader in an effort to preen in front of the cameras. Tsk. However, you need only refer to the expert testimony of Fox’s alt-lip-reading specialist, Kellyjane Conjob, to confirm that this account is true. What’s that? You don’t see his lips moving at all? Well that is because even the fascist liberal cameras used by the MSM are programmed to record their own bias. Double tsk.

Who am I kidding? Who would believe that…